response to The Dark Side of the Stim: Self-injury and Destructive Habits

ref: The Dark Side of the Stim: Self-injury and Destructive Habits

I’ve been finding it hard to explore and coherently explain my recently realised Autistic traits and symptoms – which is a bit mad because over the last 13 years I’ve become a bit of an expert on decoding and relaying what my non-verbal and severely effected ASD twins need as exhibited in their stimming and other behaviour.

I really hope that someone somewhere is also taking the initiative to refer and listen to us – we need better understanding and tolerance individually and as a community with a recognised collective ‘neuro-diversity’ I think we can more precisely request how the support we get could be improved and made more appropriate and effective – I’m thinking more about our kids and making the future brighter for them. In my experience, services and resources can be a bit hit and miss but regardless – they are always delivered by wonderful people and I’m so grateful that they’re there to catch us when we fall but I’m also a massive believer in personally substantiating continuous improvement by taking responsibility and being empowered by people who know what I need is help to be able to help myself because there is NO WAY I’m prepared or able to listen to someone else’s usually advice or direction incorrectly concluded based on assumptions that are completely wrong – because either I struggle to explain myself clearly or worse – they haven’t even bothered to ask questions to talk to me directly and they would quickly realise that actually they are not going to be any help to me before they take some time to look at the situation as it really is (and not as it seems) and with my help reassess.

I’ve been trying to figure out how to say this for a while now… it’s my stimming…for me for sure – there’s a connection between my (recently released) Aspy-self, the need for stim, and cycles of about 6/7 years which I’ve also been told are probably down to cyclic female hormone changes. I’m thinking maybe the hormones effect my need for stim and this is exhibited in my promiscuousness and/or ‘substance’ misuse. Regardless of lessons from the past; knowing this behaviour is potentially harmful, addictive or risks me becoming dependant – every 6/7 years or so I have to focus on understanding why I use sex, drugs, alcohol to cope because otherwise I’m going to loose control – and I can’t cope with that either.. I’ve just realised that cyclically over my 42 years at times when I feel completely alone and misunderstood I’ve easily and instantly found comfort and confidence when I choose to use drugs or initiate sex because, to quote your article I’ve self managed my need for “intense, un-ignorable stimulation that will drown out the world and provide a focal point”. The danger for me is when instead of a way of coping with the world that stim or ‘focal point’ becomes the only thing in the world that matters… and that’s when I really start loosing the plot and missing out on life. Does anyone else resonate with this or know of any useful research, or findings, articles etc that might help me understand better and find less harmful ways of coping?

Thanks again for reading my comment 🙂

~ by paperworkfairy on December 22, 2018.

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